What is it, this tension I feel? Is it because I'm seeing my oldest grandson, Powie, for lunch? No, I am genuinely excited about that, Have even figured out the menu that I will have my driver buy. Just two big sticks of delicious barbecue and the eggplant relish sold down the street. Good old-fashioned Filipino food to alleviate his years in San Francisco. What am I talking about? They have delicious Filipino food available there. Well, I throw myself in for comfort. No, that's not the tension I feel.
What is it? It hovers between tension, anxiety, eagerness, a tightening of the chest so breathing is somewhat constricted, though not too seriously. It's just a feeling that this old body is slowing down but pleasantly. I think I am genuinely looking forward to something, to an event that will happen probably soon. I just wish I knew exactly what it will be.
So no, it is not tension after all. It's looking forward. I think I am looking forward to teaching writing again. This all began over lunch with my second grandson, Nicc. He asked me to teach him how to write and that moved me. Okay, I said, I will open a class for you but this time it will be for men only. Why? Because in my previous classes I noticed a minority of men and they were often cowed by the women. Women have easier access to their right brains. Men are stronger in the left brain. I have to learn how to open up their right brains so they can flow with my process and become better writers. This very thought excites me.
Lat night I took down the book I use for my writing classes and began to study again. That is what adds a buoyancy to my life these days, the new thing I will be doing in a few weeks. I will be teaching men how to write.
That is immensely exciting for me.
No comments:
Post a Comment